The Transgendered Mile, Part Two
by Laura Amato
Drag Queen Drag King
No discussion of the GLBTQ Community would be complete without discussing Drag Queens and Drag Kings. These fabulous members of the performing arts are lavish entertainers. They usually perform in Drag Shows and mimic or overexagerate men and women, usually to lip-syncing. Most are gay or lesbian. No Pride Day would be complete without them. Though they are not Transgender Some Drag Queens have been referred to as Transvestites. Their styles are both flamboyant and fun. As with any part of our communtity one size does not always fit all. Some Trans men and women as well as hetrosexual men and straight women do Drag as well. If you haven't seen a drag show it is simply something you must see.
There are old and new versions of the word Crossdresser. Transvestite is an old term and not used very much anymore. For the purpose of this article it is important to understand the meanings themselves. There are many different types of crossdressers. For the purpose of this article we are concerned with two, The Fetishist and the Crossdresser. Each definition has a lot of sub-categories we won;t go into here.
As we move further across the Transgender Mile you will notice that it isn't unusual for a person to have some elements of more than one classification. This usually comes with age and some maturity in the classification. It isn't unusual for a crossdresser to have the eroticism of the fetishist. Some Crossdressers even want to grow breasts which is part of the transsexual element. Remember to choose your base class first and the elements later. In a mile there are a lot of submarkers with a decimal.
Fetishist Crossdressers are primarily interested in eroticisim and sexual gratification. This is the primary motivation. For some, this is merely a first step and others go no further than this. Remember that we are all sexual beings and that masturbation is perfectly normal. What turns one on may be different for one than for another. This is neither right or wrong, merely individual. If this is where you are on the scale you have nothing to be ashamed of. In fact as long as you can accept that this is part of you you probably don't need therapy, unless you can't overcome the shame and guilt. OCD Obsessive compulsive disorder is common In Fetishistic CD's. It is controllable with medication. A therpist can screen for this. One thing to watch for is that in time it is possible that the objects used in masturbation don;t become the only metod used because it can affect intimate relationships over the long term.. Balance is the key here.
It is usually triggered in the early teen years. The persona of the fetishist is male and has male assumptive attitudes towards women and they may not see women as they actually are. It is about the objects and their sensuality more than gender that works for them.. Fetishists rarely dress fully or give themselves female names. They are usually just into feminine underthings, slips and possibly just lipstick. There is a lot of fantasy at this stage. It is not unusual for a fetishist to mix and match other fetishises in with the partial crossdressing. Some don't even consider this transgender since gender plays a minimal part here. Gender is always more male than female. After release the Fetishist is still all male and rarely goes further until he ages.
Crossdressers A crossdresser usually fully dresses in the clothing of the opposite gender. This is usually done in full outfits complete from head to toe with makeup. This usually Starts in later teen years. In time the crossdresser matures and develops a complete female persona, complete with name.
The femine side may have seperate needs and wants that need to be met. Expressing a shade of the female persona is what a crossdresser is about. It is mere expression of just one side of the person. Dressing relieves stress and after it is over the cd returns to being all man. Crossdressers are hetrosexual and rarely gay. Sometimes a crossdresser to reduce stress where an item of female underwear under male attire. It serves two purposes; It keeps stress at bay and may extend the time needed until the next dressing session. This is different than for the fetishist.
Therapy is usually not needed unless guilt and shame occupies their thoughts. OCD is common and is usually controlled with medication. The key to crossdressing is control. As long as the dressing isn;t running ones life all is well.
Marraiges rarely end because of crossdressing. The dressing is usually compromisable since often all the cd needs is some private time. The Crossdressers Bill of Rights for wives and Crossdressers is a good starting point. Crossdressers can always buy their own clothes and it is not necesary for the wife to be a part of the cd world if she doesn't wish too. Shopping together though can be a fun time for both