Help, I Think I'm Transsexual! Now What?
by Laura Amato
Its been with you all of your life. Sometimes in the foreground, often times in the background. Its really influenced your life but you never realized it. Then suddenly one day you receive a startling revelation. You are a woman trapped In a man's body. You are Transsexual.
You let your mind drift back to your childhood and you realize that this has always been with you, though not as strong. Before you'd put it in the back of your mind. Besides telling anyone back then would have meant certain ridicule and ostracism. So you ignored it and went on with
your life, pretending to be the man you appear to be. That's been fine up until today.
Now its exploded and overwhelmed you. Where did all this come from? Why now? I can't think about this now. I have a wife and kids. I have responsibilities. Yet an eerie calm comes over you as the pieces of your life start to form a complete picture for the first time. You ask yourself,
what do I do about this? What are my options?
Don't panic. If you are having extreme anxiety, depression, or compulsive thoughts ask your doctor to recommend a Psychiatrist. Perhaps the right medication can help you get your thoughts together so you can see this clearly. While you're there ask him if he can recommend a Psychologist who specializes in "Gender Dysphoria" or Gender Issues.
Your gender counselor will help you sort out your thoughts and develop a plan with you for dealing with the Dysphoria. If he finds that you are indeed a Transsexual he may recommend the following steps:
Start facial electrolysis as soon as possible. Removing the beard will require from 200 to 300 hours. Between sessions you will need to grow your beard stubble slightly. This step should be nearly completed before starting transition for obvious reasons.
Most gender counselors follow the HBIGDA Standards of care developed by Dr. Harry Benjamin. These standards are in place to prevent you from making an irreversible mistake. Obviously once steps are set in motion, hormones administered and surgeries performed you will not be able to slip back into your old life.
Next comes the preparation for transition. Before any surgeries can be done you will have to live and work from one to two years as a woman. You would need to either prepare for transition at work or find another job. Develop a plan to tell your family and friends. This can be the hardest step of all.
About now you're ready for your first hoop as your Counselor writes your Transition and Hormone recommendation letters. You'd need to visit an Endocrinologist for testing and Hormones. You're also required to get a legal name change.
Hormones will do the following for you: They will give you a sense of calm and peace with your condition. It will soften your skin, reduce your bodyhair and you will start to grow breasts. Your body fat will be redistributed. Your scalp hair may thicken slightly. Hormones may also change your thinking and interests. In later stages your sexual orientation could change. Hormones will not change your voice.
About this time you should consider whether or not to have Facial Feminization surgery, Tummy Tuck or hair transplants. You should also be reading everything you can about your condition. Try and make friends in the Transgender Community and join a Group. Start looking at qualified Surgeons, for your Sex Reassignment Surgery (SRS) and breast implant surgery if needed. You will also need to start working on a Female voice.
The surgery itself involves inverting the penis to form a vagina and performing castration to remove the testes. In a second surgery the scrotal sack would be used to form the Labia.
The clinical nature of this description may make the whole process sound easy. It is not. In addition both the surgeries and electrolysis can be very painful. If you throw in the emotional pain of the possible loss of some friends and Family Members all this pain can be overwhelming. The suicide figures are overwhelming for Pre-op Transsexuals.
This is why this Site exists. Its meant to provide you with the resources and support you need as well as a social outlet where you can meet people like yourselves. Ask questions on our forums and talk to us in live chat.
While surgery seems to be the closest thing to a cure there are alternatives. We will be discussing this in other upcoming articles. Remember that this condition is not your fault and is not a lifestyle choice. You were most likely born with this condition.