I had a breast augmentation done
in April of 2001. If you've been considering
the procedure, this article is my attempt to let you know just how things
with me. I'm NOT saying that my experiences will be yours, nor is this
expert's primer on all there is to know about boob jobs.
Total cost for my outpatient surgery with tax and all was 4.5 K. My
located in Fort Lauderdale, is locally-famous for doing all the "HOOTERS
here (HOOTERS is a restaurant famous for skimpily-clad waitresses).
During our consultation, photos
were taken, and I was shown a book filled with
pictures of previous patients. These were neck-down shots, and although
I made it CLEAR that I did NOT want my "before" and "afters"
to appear in this
gallery and I requested this agreement in writing.
We discussed implant types and methods
of placement and delivery. At this time
I expressed my desire for a full D cup; strangely the doctor tried to
into going smaller. I insisted. Then he advocated for an incision in
something I was also against. I preferred the one-inch incision be placed
the breast. The minimal scarring was not a concern to me.
AGAIN, much to my surprise, the
doctor argued against it. He tried saying there
was a higher risk of nipple numbness if he went this way. I asked him
if a thru-the-nipple procedure was easier for HIM and he admitted it
was. I told
him I would have NO cutting done on my nipples.
Lastly, I expressed my preference
that twilight rather than full anesthesia be used.
With this, I'd be able to continue breathing on my own, a safety factor
most reassuring. It can and HAS been done, and eventually he agreed,
proviso that if I started squirming on the table I'd be put under completely.
was a customer who knew what she wanted!
My surgery was scheduled for a month later. It was in-office. I was
told to dress
warmly: wear sweat pants and heavy socks.
The night before my procedure I received a surprising phone call from
who would be in attendance. It started out jolly, but really left me
After a bit of banter, she threw a HUGE "by the way" at me.
It seems the doctor
hadn't mentioned some unusual details while I was in his office. My
feeling was he
NEVER informed his patients of these.
First, the implants would not look
"right" when placed under my pectoral muscles.
In fact, they would look SQUARE! Also, she advised me to wear VERY loose
shirts, because initially my new breasts would be sitting JUST BELOW
Within a month, they would round out and gravity would make them fall
happened to full disclosure?
OK. Next morning, I'm lying in the chilly operating room. Doctor comes
in all smiles
and says, "What we will do is make an incision in the nipple...."
WAIT a minute! I don't want that
I TOLD you.. Then out of justifiable paranoia, I
went over EACH specification above. I was taking NO chances. I had two
the nurse and anesthesiologist, so I felt reasonably safe after.
On with the show....
I woke up in what seemed a minute; my chest felt tight and heavy, and
obvious lumps that hadn't been there before-- BIG ones! In my haze I
They gave me muscle relaxants for the pecs and percoset for pain. I
was told to lie
as still as possible the first three days.
NO ONE needed to tell me that! My
friend, the pain level involved was literally THE
worst I've ever experienced. Every time I twitched it felt as if my
burst open. Perhaps this was due to having the pectoral muscle wrenched
ribcage; or maybe it was the 850 CC implants (twice the normal size)
that had been
used. All I can say is I thought I'd go crazy with the pain. The percoset
I'm NOT saying the same thing will happen with you, OK? Maybe I have
a lot of nerve
endings in there, or I'm just a big baby. Anyway, eventually the pain
strange squares rounded out and migrated south, and I had me a Playboy
like the nurse had promised. (smile)
The implants are saline. There was
a bit of sloshing at first but that went away.
They're virtually undetectable, and everything has been fine these four
In summation, although there were some frustrations and plenty of pain,
I would do
this again in a heartbeat. I've never been happier!